One of our current clients requested that we do background checks on individuals. Being on maternity/paternity leave, I’d normally ignore it until later, but Checkr is quite persistent when you ignore them, so I got it off my queue before what-pathetic-excuse-counts-for-sleep last night.
I had to announce my relief to the company.
Me: Got my background check back. Relieved to find out I’m not a sex offender anywhere.
J—: im happy for you
Me: I’m relieved too! Forwarded it to M—. She mentioned she knows the CEO of Checkr from a mobile startup, and then said, without skipping a beat, “Okay, baby, we can keep daddy around now that we know he checks out.”
(This is probably revenge for all the times I look at my son and declare to M—, “I guess I think we’ll keep him.”)