I never explained the unofficial motto of this blog.
When I started this blog 20 years ago, I wanted to have a north star guiding me as to why I was doing this at all. I searched the internet for quotes on writing and came across this gem from Edwin Schlossberg:
The skill of writing is to create a context in which other people can think.
This morning, Benjamin and I had to get a blood test. I guess this makes us blood brothers.
It’s been about 8 years since my last test. Now that Benjamin is one year old, his pediatrician wants him tested for lead as a precaution since housing in San Francisco can date back to when paint and pipes had lead.
When getting him ready for the visit, I got him dressed. He started repeating “sosh” when I was putting on his socks. I mistakenly thought the lab could get a sample from his foot, so I skipped putting on his shoes.
He saw me pick up his sandals, and ran at me yelling “shoosh!” But when I dropped them in his diaper bag, he wasn’t having it at all. He associates his “shoosh” with going out, thought this meant I was leaving without him, and started crying.
It took all of five seconds, but that was five seconds too long for my son.
…
Continue reading about adventures in blood testing after the jump
One year ago today:
Marie is starting her third trimester. Late last night, she started to spoon me. "Wait, where is your body pillow?" I asked.
"Right now, you are," she mumbled as she tried to fall back asleep.
…
"Oh!" I exclaimed.
"Yeah, the baby is kicking. Did you feel that?"
"Oh! there it is again… and again!"
"He’s really active right now."
"Yeah, I’m can feel it on my butt cheek. Our son is literally kicking my ass!"
Giving up after the 5th try of getting that last piece of curdled milk out of his 4th neck chin.
Does this mean, I’m officially a dad?
Time to do as a friend forwarded to me?
She says to me at 1 AM: “I’m so glad I sucked the snot out of our son’s nose… it wasn’t really gross at all.”
This was a short while after she showed me his boogies in the snot sucker with far more pride than when she showed me her finisher’s medal after her first triathlon.
Apparently, the sucker has a filter in it… or something.
Something I learned today…
Babies can develop blisters on lips because of vigorous breastfeeding
My son shows he is clearly a milk vampire.
By the afternoon, with the air quality getting a little better, M— was beyond tired, so Benjamin took took me in his ride, a Chicco KeyFit 30 Caddy, “cruisin’ for some chicks” (his words, of course, not mine). We were going stir-crazy at home anyway.
Because the warm weather, he wanted to just buckle up and jet and show his rockin’ bod he and mommy have been working on for the last 10 months, but M— thought the seat restraints would chafe his new baby skin and selected a dinosaur shirt from Auntie Nora that all the honey babies in his life (Mommy) thought made him look cute. While it did cover up his awesome guns, he finally relented, and we were off to give M— some much needed rest for a couple hours
We walked through the park, and, on the way back, he thought mommy would like some food to keep her milk all nice and yummy so we picked up some egg bread, spam musubi, and Garlic Noodle w/Pan Seared Prawn on the trip home. He even survived his first diaper change in the field (though, mommy was right: I should have packed more wipes and diapers in the Pronto Changing Station).
Unfortunately, other than a few comments about how cute he was, he didn’t get to pick up any chicks. I thought it meant I failed as a wingman, but Benjamin blames the ‘rona.
Fuck Trump.
Here is a selfie of just him and the boys.
Things I never thought I’d say when I became a parent:
Apparently, my son really likes Wet-Ass Pussy:
Clara Health has asked Checkr to run your background check
One of our current clients requested that we do background checks on individuals. Being on maternity/paternity leave, I’d normally ignore it until later, but Checkr is quite persistent when you ignore them, so I got it off my queue before what-pathetic-excuse-counts-for-sleep last night.
This morning:
I had to announce my relief to the company.
Me: Got my background check back. Relieved to find out I’m not a sex offender anywhere.
J—: im happy for you
Me: I’m relieved too! Forwarded it to M—. She mentioned she knows the CEO of Checkr from a mobile startup, and then said, without skipping a beat, “Okay, baby, we can keep daddy around now that we know he checks out.”
(This is probably revenge for all the times I look at my son and declare to M—, “I guess I think we’ll keep him.”)
I took off Tuesday from work to hang with my cousin, Peter.
After the recent death of his father, he was inspired to take up bicycling again for his health. I helped him buy a gravel bicycle. He also purchased a bicycle for his daughter, Lila.
We spent the day building and testing both bicycles and talking about a lot of stuff. Because we grew up six years apart on different coasts, this was the most time I think we’ve ever talked.
That morning Peter told Lila, “Uncle Terry’s going to come over while you’re in school and help me build your bicycle!” She asked if I’d still be there when she got back.
Well, even though I had insomnia the night before and gotten very little sleep, I had to stay. It was well worth it…
Karen said Lila was telling everyone in her class how excited she is that she was getting a bicycle. Lila doesn’t know how to ride a bicycle just yet, but she already sticker-bombed her bike like a boss.
I wish them a long lifetime of happy trails. Hopefully, I’ll get to go on a couple rides with them.