Wedding Videos? I can’t help

For the eighth time(!), someone has managed to contact me out of the blue though random Googling about C—. My flickr photos seem to be the largest single culprit and the fact that I’m pretty free with my own contact information doesn’t help matters.

If it is about weddings. I can’t help you. I broke up with C— eleven months ago. I know less than almost anyone else what is going on with her.

Literally. A friend called me once and said, “Hey do you know that C—’s website says yadda yadda?” and it was news to me. Another friend asked me why he didn’t get some videos of hers and it turned out I didn’t even know what city she was in (he knew; I didn’t). Today, a disgruntled bride sent me a copy of C—’s last blog entry mentioning me which I read for the first time.

If you were not able to contact her, then having me try to help out contact her is like six steps in the wrong direction. Anyone who knows where she is or what she is doing is going to definitely not tell you anything if you drop my name. (That advice is just about the only help I can provide you.)

Please don’t bother contacting me about weddings. (I’m going to redirect you to this article in the future.) I’ve come off pretty well from the break-up. You, I can understand, have gotten a really bad deal.

I never had anything to do with the business portion of that wedding business—I only photographed weddings for fun and all the photos I have provide free to the bride and groom, including the digital negatives. The only time I even operated a video camera at a wedding was when I was promised a quid pro quo from C— to finish producing a conference talk I gave. That, obviously, never happened, but it’s no big deal—I give lots of talks; your wedding is (I hope) not so often repeated.

(This is what sucks about the Internet—you never get free of your past because it’s cached.)

Being a professional

To any of you thinking about becoming a professional wedding photographer or videographer, here is the only advice I have: discharge your obligation with the import that it was your own wedding. If something “comes up,” then, like a bad relationship, it is better if you inform the other party immediately and deal with it, than let it drag on and leave a mess in your wake.

This may seem obvious, but I was really that stupid—on the relationship part.

A city hall wedding

A city hall wedding
City Hall, San Francisco, California

Nikon D200, 12-24mm f/4G
1/13 sec @ f/4, iso 500, 12mm (18mm)

This was the last wedding I was at. It took place in city hall in San Francisco, a city I would be moving to next year, though I didn’t know it at the time. The wedding was very beautiful.

Doing your taxes

I mentioned this story about being a genius in science but not being able to do your taxes. While I can’t claim to be so smart as to be a genius in anything, my relationships are like my “taxes.”

Ultimately it’s very humbling to be so obviously incompetent at something.

I put off my taxes until too late too…and pay the price. Hmm, that analogy does indeed go a long way.

2 thoughts on “Wedding Videos? I can’t help

  1. That doesn’t look like a city hall for me, it looks more like a castle. Even though the picture is quite far it was a perfect angle because it has captured that magnificent background. Now, that you’re moving there I’m sure you’ll see more of this.

    I can’t quite understand what you mean by this — If something “comes up,” then, like a bad relationship, it is better if you inform the other party immediately and deal with it, than let it drag on and leave a mess in your wake. Would you mind giving sample situations?

  2. Great advice about “discharging your obligation” as a videographer. Producing a wedding video gives you only one chance to get it right.

    As a videographer, you have to be a dog with a bone when it comes to communicating with the couple. Both parties have to be crystal clear when it comes to expectations.

    Woe be to those who ignore this advice.

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