“Supposedly, this guy is the Korean Usher.”:

Me: “Maybe Usher is the Black Sol?”

…

I’m just saying, don’t mess with Taeyang or he’ll cut you

…with his hair!

…

When I was in the third grade, my house got a sample bottle of Prell. I did the same thing as Taeyang to my hair—I’d put it in and not wash it out. Who knew I was ahead of my time?

…

My Prell mohawk lasted only a day: 1) I ran out of Prell; 2) the thing flopped over by the time I got to school and made me look like a really greasy Adolf Hitler. (Yes, I spent recess with my best friends saluting me with a “seig heil!”)