Category: humor

Stuff I found that was funny.

The New Onion

Marie sent me this article today with the comment: “Surprisingly, not an Onion headline.”

The New Onion

The article says:

> The Texas congressman said that if Mr. Obama persists in executing the office of the Presidency *as defined by the Constitution,* he could face “impeachment and/or deportation.” … “Mr. President, there’s still time for you to get in line. But if you continue to fulfill the duties of President of the United States that are *expressly permitted* in the Constitution, you are playing with fire.”

If true, Reality has jumped the shark.

Posted on by tychay 0

Pear-to-Pear networking

> This resume I’m reviewing claims the dude developed a “pear-to-pear private tracker”

Since [I had ComicLife open anyways][techcrunch], this was too good to pass up:

pear-pear networking

[techcrunch]: http://terrychay.com/article/the-only-people-who-read-techcrunch-are-your-competitors.shtml “The only people who read tech crunch are your competitors”

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August 1, 2012… On the way to karaoke

> So the other day — right over there — I saw a bum playing some buckets and another guy right next to him accompanying on an iPad. And, I was like… “This is the future.”
>
> — K3, Senior Jedi Program Coordinator, Wikimedia Foundation

Posted on by tychay 0

The Thunderscan story

I’m surprised I never got around to mentioned this, when [I promised I would][nans second story]. Since it’s been years, go back and read it, and come back. I’ll wait.

…

In high school, I owned a [Thunderscan][Thunderscan]. For those of you too lazy to click on the link, this was a device that would digitize photos by replacing the ink cartridge of your ImageWriter, [a dot-matrix printer][dot-matrix printer], popular with Macintosh computers of the era.

(For those of you too young to remember what a dot-matrix printer is: in the old days, our printers were slow enough that you could watch an episode of *[Cheers][Cheers]* waiting for it to print out an article or “graphics” —the latter of which was whatever came out of [Print Shop][theprintshop]. And they were so loud, that a popular accessory was huge muffled box to place the printer in, in order to contain what can only be described as the primal periodical scream of the then nascent personal computer, “Why the f*&k do I have to be tasked for the next half our printing up a sinfully ugly banner for [your terrible P.T.A Yard Sale][review the print shop]?”)

Now imagine something that did the reverse (put print into the computer) by scanning it line by line. And realize that a typical “line” of text back then was actually 24 “lines” to this scanner.

This was a Thunderscan.

Continue reading The Thunderscan story after the jump

Posted on by tychay 0

Conan on a roll

Marie showed me two videos the other day from Conan’s new show on TBS.

The first is Triumph at Occupy Wall Street:

And the other is Louis C.K., who was there to promote [his new web-streaming comedy concert][louisck web] commenting on social media

Both were from the same episode.

[louisck web]: http://artsbeat.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/11/04/louis-c-k-plans-online-broadcast-of-comedy-concert/ “Louis C. K. Plans Online Broadcast of Comedy Concert—Art Beats @ New York Times”

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Just keep shooting

One brunch, I noticed that a trio of my friends all had single-letter twitter names. I asked them to activate their wonder-tweet powers. They obliged:

@a @c @k

@a @c @k
Zazie’s, Cole Valley, San Francisco, California

Olympus E-P1, M.ZUIKO Digital 17mm 1:2.8 Pancake
2 exposures, 1/60sec @ ƒ2.8, ISO400, 17mm (35mm)

After discussing the [kissy ass face][kissy anus face] video, I asked my friends to pose one of the things that were “too dirty for [College Humor][college humor].”

Do the kissy-anus-face

Do the kissy-anus-face
Eddie Rickenbacker’s, SoMa, San Francisco, California

Leica M8, Cosina-Voigtländer NOKTON 35mm F1.2 Aspherical
3 exposures @ 1/30sec, iso 320, 35mm (47mm)

One thing I like to do is keep shooting even after people are done posing, the smiles are more honest.

[kissy anus face]: http://vimeo.com/344008 “Jeff and I at the Rejection Show—Vimeo”
[college humor]: http://www.collegehumor.com/ “College Humor”

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Show Me What I'm Looking For

Overheard:

“This is another song from a Swedish band.”

“Are they Swedish or something else?”

“I don’t know—some Scandinavian country I think. The song isn’t bad.”

“I think it’s a bit overplayed—it’s featured in a lot of TV and movies.”

“Yes, I guess you’re right. Did you know that it’s played a lot in evangelical churches, even though it not about religion?”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah, listen to the lyrics… ‘Save me, I’m lost.’… ‘Oh lord I’ve been waiting for you.’”

“Wow, he was asking for it!”

*Laughs* “Yeah. He probably shouldn’t have added ‘Oh Lord.’”

(The fact that the lead singer looks like [White Jesus][white jesus] doesn’t help either.)

[white jesus]: http://www.stuffwhitechristianslike.com/2009/02/15-white-jesus.html “White Jesesus—Stuff White Christians Like”

Continue reading the lyrics to Show Me What I’m Looking For after the jump

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Understandable navigation

Me (as navigator): Okay go right here and then turn left onto Mission.

… (later)

Me: Are you sure you are going the right direction?

[Her][thesimplist]: I got it under control.

Me: I think you must have gone the wrong direction earlier.

Her: I turned onto Mission like you said.

Me: Oh! I should have told you that the turn was more like a hairpin left.

Her: You give terrible directions.

Me: Well don’t blame me, blame Google. See?

Flip a bitch

Her: Those directions are terrible, it should have said, “Flip a bitch onto Mission Street.”

Are you listening, Siri?

[thesimplist]: http://thesimpli.st/ “The Simplist: Being. Doing. Enjoying”

Posted on by tychay 0