It’s interesting how self-context can change a city.

Last time I visited Amsterdam, I was in a terrible relationship, living in South Bay and I got robbed leaving Schiphol. Three years later, I’m single living in San Francisco and am a tiny bit wiser.

This time, for instance, I found out that Amsterdam smells a lot like San Francisco.

(Back then, I thought Patchouli was pot, so what did I know?)

[Amsterdam women after the jump]

One of the first things I did when I returned was IM a Dutch friend in San Francisco.

M—: Welcome back! How was it?
M—: So it’s 1:30 AM for you now?

Me: No. It’s 4:29 PM. My plane just landed.
Me: I’m so out of sync I don’t know what’s up.

M—: Must’ve been pretty awesome to be in Amsterdam during the slaughter of France.

Me: It was nice, but some people asked me questions during halftime and I missed all the awesome goals.

M—: You serious? Man… those goals were amazing. I’m still amazed
M—: Did you go out after the game?

Me: Only for a little. I was jetlagged. We saw the game at Werck next to the church.

M—: Oh wow on the Keizersgracht?
M—: Did they tell you what Werck means?

Me: Nope.

M—: “Work” So that you can tell your wife “Honey, I’m going to work” 😀

Me: Haha. Respect!
Me: I had some orange on so I kept waving my big orange Netherlands hand and jumping up and down every time someone honked. (my shirt)

M—: Awesome!

Me: By the way, you never told me that Amsterdam girls are cute.
Me: Haha.

M—: Haha. Yeah I’ve been asked many times why on earth I left that place: “Do you know how many girls you leave behind??”

Me: Yeah, and they end every sentence with “Yes” in that sexy Dutch accent, yes?
Me: If I wasn’t jetlagged, I’d have been SOOOO macking on them, yes?

M—: Haha.
M—: So you’re home now?
M—: Was the flight ok?

Me: It was long. But I like the direct better.
Me: Plus my stewardess was eye candy.
Me: And she was Dutch so she kept saying yes. “Would you like a beverage, yes?” “Would you like chicken or beef, yes?”

M—: I believe KLM scouts for cute…plus the blue uniforms help.
M—: Did you manage to swear in Dutch? I saw a tweet about that.

No response from me. (I fell asleep typing at the keyboard.)

Red light district

Yes, we visited the red-light district. I had to find it based on my memory of three years ago. Only this time, it was during the day and it turns out the main canal turns family friendly during the day. Sure there were sex shops, but no prostitutes. Go figure.

We left disappointed.

Via a back alley.

“Whoa! That’s not a mannequin!”

Eyes wide open the entire short alley.

“Hey guys, I think I left something back there. Let’s do that again…I mean…We have to go back.”

Not so disappointed. 🙂

Other ideas.

5 thoughts on “Amsterdam

  1. You find a nice table to drink a coke at and all of a sudden you’re keeping someone from viewing the second half! 😉 Plus the swearing in dutch deal is still on the next time you visit the netherlands, of course.

  2. Amsterdam is a crazy city and i think getting robbed is not that difficult,
    i guess it´s less safe than usual european cities like London, Berlin or Hamburg

  3. well, you saw the last of the RLD: Amsterdam city has bought off the RLD/Chinatown from the owner and decided to “requalify” the borough, meaning the closure of the “most ancient industry/profession”

  4. to Johnny:

    Amsterdam is quite safe, try Lisbon, Barcelona or Rome or many italian cities and you’ll see.

    Of course Amsterdam has its quota of drug addicts but they’re relatively inoffensive and roughly as safe a Berlin/London

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